I follow the impulse. It's murky, but patterns are emerging. What surrounds me now is resentment. I've sat here many times before, but this feels different. I have some control over it now.

I still don't understand. Something about a ladder. Moonfaller. You lost it.

Your opponent could see right thru you.

I'm going to be punished, aren't I? I'm going to be upset. I don't remember what I saw. I wasn't there.

I was present, but not accounted for. A stranger still. A bit of noise here and there, but mostly silence. I think about the less fortunate. Suffering.

I can only tell you what I saw. A brief history of time. I don't know where you came from. Something about orange juice and Europeans. I was obsessed with the gold and the riches. Luxury. You really were just like me.

That's what the words all said, but I wasn't really reading. Not till after the fight. Before, I was just enamored. Blissful. Thinking about the way it made me feel.

That was all that mattered in those moments.